The Point of No Return

riddlemetom:

the 7th harry potter book was released july 21st 2007 that is exactly 7 years ago today

today’s the day to make a horcrux y’all

(via huggingsherlockinthetardis)

urulokid:

poutineisdelicious:

xekstrin:

majere636:

arachnofiend:

marapetsrules:

bobfoxsky:

“You fool. No man can kill me.”

How many times am I allowed to reblog this before it gets weird?

image

Fun facts: Tolkien constructed this scene because he came out of Macbeth thinking that Shakespeare had missed a golden opportunity with the ”Be bloody, bold, and resolute; laugh to scorn the power of man, for none of woman born shall harm Macbeth” prophecy

Being letdown by Macbeth is apparently a significant factor in Tolkien’s writing because the Ent/Huorn attack on Isengard was the result of his disappointment that the whole “til Birnam Wood come to Dunsinane” thing was just some dudes holding sticks and not actual ambulatory trees.

so he basically took his favorite shakespeare headcanons and put them into his AU fic

This revelation just knocked me over.

LET ME TELL YOU A THING ABOUT JOHN RONALD REUEL TOLKIEN. BACK THE FUCK UP SIT THE FUCK DOWN YOU KNOW NOTHING ABOUT ANYTHING YOU’RE FUCKING JON SNOW HERE. LET ME TELL U A THING

JONNY T WAS LITERALLY THE BIGGEST FANBOY TO EVER WALK THE EARTH. LITERALLY THIS FUCKIN NERD WENT INTO WORLD WAR ONE AND WROTE NORSEFIC EDDA FANFIC IN THE TRENCHES AND SENT IT TO ALL HIS FRIENDS WHO WERE PRESUMABLY LIKE “JOHN WHAT THE FUCK”

BUT IT DOESN’T END THERE

HIS WIFE? MADE HER AND HIMSELF INTO SELF-INSERT OCS IN SAID FIC. ALSO MADE HIMSELF A TOTAL TYR SELF INSERT CHARACTER. ALL VERY DRAMATIC. KEPT WRITING THIS FIC UNTIL IT WAS HUGE. AFTER HE DIED HIS SON PUBLISHED IT AND CALLED IT THE SILMARILLION. JRR YOU FUCKIN NERD

WAIT I’M NOT FUCKING DONE YET. TREEBEARD? BASED THE WAY HE TALKED OF HIS OLD FRIEND JACK WHO YOU ALL MIGHT KNOW AS CS LEWIS. THAT’S RIGHT. THAT NARNIA MOTHERFUCKER. WROTE HIM INTO LORD OF THE RINGS AKA THE SEQUEL TO THE SEQUEL OF HIS ORIGINAL FANFIC MASTERPIECE. CS LEWIS FUCKING HATED LORD OF THE RINGS. TOLKIEN FUCKING HATED NARNIA. BASICALLY THEY STARTED THE OXFORD PROFESSOR LIVEJOURNAL CLUB AND THEY FLAMED EACH OTHER’S SHIT RELENTLESSLY YET REMAINED BFFS

SHELOB? FUCKING TARANTULA BIT J-TIDDY ON THE FOOT WHEN HE WAS LIKE 3. WROTE IT INTO LORD OF THE RINGS.

HIS AUNT’S HOUSE? NAMED BAG END. YEAH YOU GUESSED IT WROTE IT INTO LORD OF THE RINGS

THIS FUCKING DORKUS SUPREME MADE UP HIS OWN LANGUAGE. WAIT NO IM WRONG. HE MADE UP LIKE 80 LANGUAGES AND DIALECTS AND ALPHABETS AND SHIT 

BEST PART OF ALL?? HIS OWN LAST NAME, TOLKIEN, WAS DERIVED FROM THE GERMAN “TOLKHUN” MEANING “FOOLHARDY”. DOES THAT RING A BELL TO ANYONE FAMILIAR TO LORD OF THE RINGS??? BECAUSE YOU SHOULD KNOW THAT PEREGRIN “PIPPIN” TOOK’S LIKE FUCKING CATCHPHRASE WAS “FOOL OF A TOOK”. TOLKIEN FIC’D HIS OWN FAMILIAL LINGUISTIC HISTORY INTO HIS WORK WHAT A DWEEB

IN 2008 HE RANKED 6TH ON A LIST OF THE TOP 50 BRITISH WRITERS SINCE 1945. HE WAS A PROFESSOR OF LANGUAGES AND OTHER IMPORTANT STUFFY SHIT AT OXFORD

AND JRR TOLKIEN WAS THE BIGGEST DWEEB EVER TO LIVE

THE END

(Source: the-peoples-of-middle-earth, via imsorryimlate)

kitsuneginger:

sektumsempra:

musicalofethics:

me dad’s a muggle

                                                                 mam’s a witch

bitofanastyshockforhimwhenhefoundout

I forgot about Seamus for a minute and wondered why Voldemort had suddenly developed an Irish accent.

(Source: musical-ofethics, via horcruxesoverhallows)

hellyeahyums:

the-gingerdancer:

sextronautt:

how can lawyers argue without crying 

or swearing

if i went into a courtroom i’d be all

now you fucking listen here you little cumslut 

"he has been found guilty

"HA IN YOUR FUCKING FACES, BITCHES."

(via fandoms-have-the-tardis)

tardiscrash:

Let’s be real, in a time before the internet people didn’t have more adventures and make more meaningful connections. They watched TV and listened to CDs. Before that they listened to records and read magazines. Before that they listened to the radio and read bad dime novels. Before that they embroidered or some shit.

People have been staying inside and ignoring other people for as long as there have been buildings. 

(via imsorryimlate)

crockercorp:

does anyone else have this other self they’ve created in their mind that is not really exactly you irl but is more like what you want to be and has a life that continues in your head with like weird continuing daydreams but they’re not perfect or anything and wow i forget where i was going with this

(Source: tardismemes, via kawaii-on-the-streets)

blacknoonajade:

penis-hunger-games:

calleo:

thelegendofkungjew:

calleo:

groovyphilia:

Apparently, this was the guy who was deported for being too handsome.
Suddenly, I understand.

Pretty sure it’s not just women they should have been ‘worried about’ not being able to—what was the wording? Control themselves?
That guy is hot.

I’m straight as an arrow and a Jew and I’d let him do things to me so vile they’d make Moses rise from the dead and punch me in the throat.

At which point, Moses would take a look at that guy and ask to join in.

this post is wild

I’m here for this. 

blacknoonajade:

penis-hunger-games:

calleo:

thelegendofkungjew:

calleo:

groovyphilia:

Apparently, this was the guy who was deported for being too handsome.

Suddenly, I understand.

Pretty sure it’s not just women they should have been ‘worried about’ not being able to—what was the wording? Control themselves?

That guy is hot.

I’m straight as an arrow and a Jew and I’d let him do things to me so vile they’d make Moses rise from the dead and punch me in the throat.

At which point, Moses would take a look at that guy and ask to join in.

this post is wild

I’m here for this. 

(Source: hahaniechan, via corpulentwallflower)